New Truths

A guy named Albert asked me out today after school. I wasn't that surprised. I knew he liked me, and I DO like him but not as a crush, you know? I'll give it a chance. He seems to be a very sweet guy so why not? You know? I talked to him on the phone. He's quiet, but he talks when he's interested. Anyways, just wanted to update lol ^_^.

Crying Embers' Magnitude

The glass of the wilted Earth shatters the potent sea,
taking sobbing Embers from their shore, littered with ash,
charred leaves and dust.
August gale, blow from the East, take rope and wind-it-round,
around their belts and flinty tears, convulsion of rock,
metal and crust.
First nadir, then zenith, first my yang, and then my yin,
hidden lava trailing pale, white marble,
distance from the wind's discover.
The stealthy glass of the observer's wonder,
controlled by her hand, the Embers' mother,
snuck this sanguine, rosen slit.
Pinched from the glass's sweet, frozen kiss.
© 2005 Arianne Watson

Annie

I saw Annie, the school play today. They actually performed it really well, and Rainey did a good job as leading role. I didn't know she could sing until today. Jerry and David were the two butlers. Hm o_o. *shrug* And Vicki was one of the NYC girls. I told Rainey she did a good job aterwards, while she was still standing on stage receiving flowers. While I was outside waiting for my mom to pick me up, she came up to me asking if I was okay. I said, "Yeah. I'm fine." She asked if I was sure, and I said yes. She was forced away by her mom, who was saying everyone was getting cold.

I appreciate Rainey's concern, but I don't think I could trust her to stay by my side as a friend - anotherwards, she's very flittish. Not only that, but she seems concerned after Jerry and I break up. I dunno. I guess I'd understand why she'd do that, and after all... it was disrespectful of me to go out with someone I knew my friends liked. Well, I dunno. I just have trouble opening up to her now.

I like this guy named Kirk in my Biology class. It's only a tiny, small, wittle crush though, so don't go freaking out on me! He's German (and seems to take pride in it), he's so nice and seems like such a gentleman, and he's very attractive. He just got out of a three year relationship so... um.. talk about 'rebound,' huh? Naw, you all should know by now that I wouldn't go out with a guy unless I got to know him. Well, it's the same in this situation.

And... it's only a little crush...

A little one.

Just... it's small.

*coughs*

A lot has happened... well... kind of.

Jerry and I broke up. It was mutual but he told me afterward that he was thinking about breaking up with me for 2-3 weeks. I can't be angry at him - there's nothing to be angry at him about. He kept my trust. He was the only one who ever made me feel so beautiful. What gift is there other than that? I would appreciate his friendship, but it is hard to keep it up when we see each other so little.

I went to the E.R two days ago in fear of a heart attack. There was nothing wrong with my heart, but I was diagnosed with Costochondritis. I hope it doesn't end up being chronic.

I've made friends with Cassandra and Britney. Well, from what I can see atleast. I talked to Cassandra on the phone last night, and Britney, talked to her in Choir. I can't say me and Britney will have a close friendship because the truth is I don't know. It depends on how much she relates with me. I relate with her because she seems pretty fun to be around and if I'm going to be friends with someone, they have to either be a supporter or need supporting. She can also make a big deal out of something and then a minute later make it out like it was nothing. She's a druggie, though so... I have to be cautious. I can't get hooked on that shit.

Cassandra's really supportive. I think we have a lot in common in our way of viewing life. She's more 'out-there' in the dating realm. I guess that's our only difference is that I take dating a little more seriously and date longer. I've found that she gets depressed a lot, which I didn't know about before.

Tomorrow I have to go to a friend's birthday party. See ya later!

Movie Critic:: Picnic (1955)

This movie, an award-winning film adaptation of the William Inge Play, is about a man named Hal Carter, an arrogant drifter, who in less than two words disturbs the peace in a quiet Kansas town when going to visit an old friend. Unfortunatly... This movie was poop. Pure, and utter - poop. Of course in 1955, these kind of scenario's must have been inspiring. In a world of betrayel, it only angered me to see more.

Millie (Susan Strasberg) is the first character to appear in the movie. She looks like a tomboy and is obviously jealous of her sister, Madge (Kim Novak). Throughout the movie, Millie (nicknamed Goonface) introduces a series of scenes where she pitifully cries, "Madge is the pretty one!" and runs off in a fit of tears. Personally? I feel sorry for this girl. SHE is the true star of this movie. Yet, of course, it is stolen by the 'perfect looking' Madge, whom gets tired of everyone telling her she's pretty. The first scene Madge appears in, she is drying her hair outside of a window. Millie goes to sit underneath the window (to read a book) and her sister's wet hair droplets land on it. Millie, upset, is countered with an arrogant response from her sister.

The sister mix-up not only upset me, but the layout of the romance scenes. Hal, the absolute main character, is sent to the Picnic with Millie. Now, as everyone knows, Millie and Hal can not end up together: There's too much of an age difference. That isn't what upset me. What upset me was the way Madge got around to stealing the man away from her little sister (whom Millie was falling in love with.) One scene featured Millie and Hal, trying to dance on a dock during the Picnic. Millie, who couldn't get a dance step down right, is interrupted by her sister Madge, coming down the steps with the perfected dance step, all the while locking eyes with Hal.

Know what I hated with burning rage? That Madge almost had to SEDUCE this man to make him fall in love with her.

This movie was poop. I rarely hate movies, but in this case?... We'll leave this up to the Oscars.

Darvocet-N 100

Is it wrong to say I love this prescription pain killer, despite the barfing, dizzyness, extreme weakness, slowed heartrate, and chilled skin? Well, if it's wrong, I don't care to be right.

Came back from the appointment yesterday. The nurse gave me some antibiotic for my 'developing' ear infection, and for the pain, I didn't take Motrin: Instead, I took Darvocet-N, which was prescribed for pain to me a while back for the last thing I needed antibiotic for. Unfortunatly, and stupidly, I took it during school. I took two tablets in the morning at 7am and close to the afternoon around 11:30. I was dizzy the whole day and everyone thought I was high because my speech was slurred and the Darvocet slowed my thinking. But oh well. They can think what they want.

7th period, I barfed it up. Luckily I had counselor's aide and I was right beside a trash can. Also luckily, the trash woman was in there and was able to get the trash bag I'd barfed in out of there before it stunk the place up.

Went into choir teary-eyed because of my barfing session. Drank some water before class. Got a mountain dew after class. Told Chris, this guy on my bus, about the whole reason I was all 'freaky', and he gave me this really wierd look. My speech was still slow and slurred, and my thinking was loopy-acting. He told me that I was a natural born pothead. He turned to the guy beside him in the bus seat and said quietly that he'd never heard of Darvocet and that I probably got high or something.... Yeah. Me? Whatever.

I don't believe in bad drugs. They're like...... bad for you.... or whatever..... Luckily, I'm sobering up from the side-effects. I think. o_o....

Maybe I'll take it again tomorrow.

New haircut, new worries... Okay, so they aren't worries..

So my mom makes an appointment for my ear (I'm always stuck with some illness) and the hospital has to call back to make the appointment. Kind of pissed off that I can't make it to school because my mom is worried about no one being home to answer the phone while she takes my brother and sister to school (they missed the bus. Typical.) Not that it was their fault. Okay... so it was. A little bit. Let's just say I hate laying blame. Okay, I've made up my mind: It's not their fault o_o...

I'd like to apologize to Jerry for last night's phone call. Although he will never be reading this thing, it still relieves me to do this. So here goes.

Sorry for last night... the phone call... I realize mostly everything I talked about was unpleasant. I hate it, burdening others with what I have to say.. Thank you so much, Jerry. For listening...

For all you out there wondering what the hell I talked about... too bad, like last post, you won't know. As much as I love anyone who reads this pointless thing, there are just some things that are, well, private. Like how I should get therapy? That's private. But I won't tell you about that.

My parents got a brain and finally bought furniture for the living room. Wow, this is my chance to become a fat, couch potato. Hopefully my brother's destructive side doesn't get turned on by the tactfulness of it all... --_--.

Appointment's been made at 2:00. I'll probably get checked out during Civics. Well, I gatta go, all. Byes =)